Question I'm in a rather unique conundrum. After much reading, listening and reflection I've concluded that there is no source of moral good or evil beyond that which serves mankind's survival. That is, one's loyalty to country and family are only meaningful in as much as they can be rationalized as serving this ultimate purpose. The result is that I now find myself at odds with what most people here in the USA and most of the world consider to be the foundation of stability -- that is religion. It's not that I'm an atheist and belief there is no God -- or even that one cannot know whether God exists. I consider myself to be an agnostic, which I define as having no belief on the matter but as having an open mind about it. Unfortunately I've seen more credible evidence for ancient astronauts than for a God. Both are intriguing notions but I can't base moral decisions on them. This leaves me with the problem of feeling quite separate from everyone I know and love. I'm aware of the historical role of religion as a kind of social glue that helps people feel part of a community. I'm also aware that it frequently can turn one community against another. To put it as plainly as possible, I think I've found the truth that I sought but I'm left isolated and unwilling to reveal the source of my separateness because I worry about the effect it would have on those I care about. I think my arguments are good enough that I might convince my brothers of this and the result is they end up arguing with their wives and getting divorced. Or I might cast doubt in the life of the kindly old lady down the road who loves to go to church and socialize with her friends? What good would I have done in revealing the truth when the result is counter to what I define as the moral good? Am I condemned to a life of hypocrisy? I finally understand why Socrates was right to drink the hemlock, but I'm forced to reconsider what he said about the unexamined life not being worth living. And I don't want to repeat his mistake. Thanks. dgp

Accepted:
March 12, 2009

Comments

You've put your conclusion by saying that morality is entirely a matter of what promotes human survival, but that, I'd suggest, isn't really the issue. I'm assuming you might be open to the idea that rampant cruelty to animals is wrong, whether or not it harms the chances for human survival. But even if you agreed, that wouldn't get you out of the dilemma you feel you're faced with.

The real issue, I think, is that you've become convinced that morality doesn't need religion, and most of the people around you think otherwise. But here's a little secret: even people who think that there's an intimate connection between religion and morality ignore the connection in most of their moral thinking. There are very few people who think that murder would be perfectly acceptable except that God has commanded otherwise. There are very few people who think it would be okay to steal someone's wallet but for the fact that God disapproves. The fact is that aside from a few hot-button issues (abortion and homosexuality being obvious cases) most people don't call on religious premises when they come to moral conclusions. And most of our moral life has more or less nothing to do with those sorts of cases. That means that on a great many issues, the difference between your agnosticism and your neighbor's or relative's belief won't really matter.

But I hear another worry in what you write. You seem to be suggesting that unless you advertise your agnosticism to the kindly old lady down the road, you're being a hypocrite. But why think that? If the subject doesn't come up, steering clear of hypocrisy doesn't call for you to raise it.

And after all, avoiding hypocrisy isn't the only issue here. There's something to be said for respecting people's right to come to their own decisions on these sorts of matters without proselytizing on behalf of your own point of view. If the kindly old lady down the street insisted on trying to convert you at every opportunity, you'd no doubt find it tiresome and annoying. And if she suspects that you're an agnostic but has decided that you're adult enough to come to your own conclusions, that doesn't make her a hypocrite.

All that said, I'm sure it's lonely feeling that you don't have any like-minded folk to hang out with. Since I don't know where you live or what your circumstances are, I don't have much concrete advice about how to find kindred souls. But they do exist, and in larger numbers than you may suspect. So hang in there. Be on the lookout for reading groups, clubs, organizations and such that have an intellectual bent. Make some connections, if possible, at the nearest college or university. Or for that matter, look for lectures and talks at more progressive religious organizations. Are there any Unitarian churches where you live? If so, there's an excellent chance that you'll find some folk who think a lot more like you do than you might have suspected. But in any case, stay away from the hemlock!